I have always been a person who can pretty much get along with everyone. I am sure there are people who just can’t stand me but up until now, I have been totally oblivious of their disdain for me. Even more than that, I am just not a person who has tons of people I “don’t like”.
I guess that is why my current situation has me so bummed. I currently have a porcupine in my life and porcupines are hard to deal with. Porcupines have sharp quills that make it difficult to hold them, hug them, talk to them and and much as I would like to admit, LOVE them.
I am struggling to love my porcupine. She has cut me with her words and vindictive behaviors. When I say hello to her, I get nothing but crickets!
Dr. Phil describes the porcupine personality type as: “People who are determined to find fault with anything and everything going on around them. Porcupine personality types are PRICKLY! As a result, people engage them, if at all, at arm’s length. The world recognizes that interacting with the porcupine is a lose-lose situation.” (Right on Dr. Phil!)
Have you EVER had to deal with a porcupine?
I realized this week that I have gotten to the point that I try to avoid my porcupine. When we HAVE to be in the same room, my heart rate elevates. I go into survival fight or flight mode getting ready for the next attack. After I come out of “fight or flight”, I go into drama mode where I dwell in my anger or frustration with her. Talking to her about our “situation” whatever “it” is, seems logical but I have seen ‘ol girl in action and I KNOW it will only make things worse.
Since I haven’t felt like I could go to her woman to woman, I have talked to my friends to get confirmation on how unbelievebly EVIL she is! (Really grown up eh?) I even said that I would no longer even try to speak to her since she doesn’t speak to me! (Boy I sound like a five year old!)
How does Jesus instructs us to deal with porcupines?
Matthew 5:43-48 (CEV)
43 You have heard people say, “Love your neighbors and hate your enemies.” 44 But I tell you to love your enemies and pray for anyone who mistreats you.
Really Jesus? I am supposed to pray for her?
45-48 Then you will be acting like your Father in heaven. He makes the sun rise on both good and bad people. And he sends rain for the ones who do right and for the ones who do wrong. If you love only those people who love you, will God reward you for that? Even tax collectorslove their friends. If you greet only your friends, what’s so great about that? Don’t even unbelievers do that? But you must always act like your Father in heaven.
Well God is perfect and I am not so why even bother? Can’t I just continue with this tic for tac thing we have going on?
“Pursuing the standard of perfection does not mean we can never fail. It means that WHEN we fail, we deal with it.” -John MacAuthur
Matthew 5:48 (The Message) “In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.”
Thank you for giving me your Word to teach me how to live. Forgive me Father for not responding to my porcupine as I should. I pray for her Lord that you would comfort her and allow her to acknowledge and feel your love. In my mind, I know that hurt people hurt people. Yet, I allowed my hurt feelings to dictate my behavior. Help me to forgive my porcupine and show me where my responsibility lies in our conflict.
I know that you love her just as much as you love me. Lord, stretch my mind and emotions so I can embrace my porcupine with grace and continue to live my life joyfully. You never said this life would be without troubles. In fact, your Word says that WHEN troubles come they should be an opportunity for joy. Help me live out my God-created identity and be a light to the world. Amen
This post is part of a weekly meme hosted by Shell at Things I can’t Say.